Sunday, July 29, 2012

Happy Birthday Michael Isaac

Last year we all sat around the table discussing the funeral.  I was kind of in a daze, not wanting to make any decisions about the funeral, and so mostly just listened.  Everyone thought Saturday, July 30th, would be the best day for the funeral so that it would be easier for people to get to Colorado or get work off.  They began making plans for that day to be the day when suddenly I just about jumped out of my chair when I remembered something very, very important.  I said, "No!  Saturday will NOT be the funeral."  Everyone looked at me surprised until I said, "It's Isaac's birthday and he will not share his birthday with his sister's funeral."  I have made enough mistakes with Isaac's birthday and I was not about to have the anniversary of his sister's burial overshadow his birthday for the rest of his life.  We chose to have the funeral on Friday, the 29th.  I hated that his birthday was surrounded by such sadness particularly with his birthday history which you might want to read about here and here.  It's like a mean joke that his birthday just keeps getting shafted and I really hate it.  This year I feel bad because his brother Eli is still recovering from surgery and so our activities for the day are limited.  But, it's still going to be a good day and I've invited a few friends over for a play date and later when Mike comes home we will all go to dinner at Chili's (Isaac's requested dinner) and then I plan on buying him an Ice cream cake from Dairy Queen (also his request).  So, all is not lost and he will still have a good birthday with cake, friends, presents, and a yummy dinner.

Mostly, I've thought a lot about his birthday this week in particular.  I can't help but feel sad today, July 29th, as I remember that horrible day when we buried Laila.  I just keep thinking about how numb I felt, watching the activities around me and feeling like I was having an out of body experience.  I remember waking up the next morning determined to make Isaac's birthday wonderful but feeling so, so sad.  Thanks to our parents and Isaac's awesome aunts (who purchased a cake and presents for Isaac), we were able to make it a fun day for him.  This week, as I remember all those happenings, I find myself thinking about death and birth and the miracle of how we come to this earth to gain our bodies and then the process with which we return home to our Heavenly Father.  It's made me think about this post I wrote about Isaac's birth.  It was such a spiritual experience for me and now as I think about celebrating Isaac's birthday so closely to the anniversary of the death of his sister, I find some peace in remembering that these children of mine are so precious--gifts from Heavenly Father.  I am filled with happiness at the prospect of celebrating LIFE tomorrow.  While today I think of death, tomorrow I think of LIFE.  And Isaac's life in particular.  We are so blessed to have him in our home.  I am certain that anyone that knows Isaac knows of his special spirit and that bond that began with a song of his previous home, has only grown stronger.  And as I write this, I suddenly realize that Isaac and Laila share something else--the song I am a Child of God.  It is still the song he requests when it's his turn to choose a bed time song and it is the song we chose to put on Laila's headstone.

So happy birthday my Isaac.


The Duke said...

Isaac is definitly a special spirit. He is very handsome, too! (You can blush, Isaac, if you want to blush.)
We hope you have a very, very happy day today! Happy birthday!

Lokodi said...

Happy birthday Isaac. I hope you have a wonderful birthday. I sure love how sweet you always are. Keep smiling you beautiful boy.


Michelle said...

Happy Birthday Isaac. I hope it's great and that you enjoy your cake!

Jason said...

I miss your boys. They are so full of life and are a lot of fun to tease. Happy birthday, Isaac. I know I am a day late but I hope you had a fun day yesterday.

Jess and Jason said...

Happy Birthday to Isaac. He really is an incredible boy!