Why Mormon women go into depression

I have recently been reminded that I am not a very creative person and that I am surrounded by very talented people.

This ward couldn't be more different than my BYU ward but there is one thing that they share in common right now and that is that everyone is pregnant right now. Well, not everyone, because I'm not pregnant. Anyway, my friend Ali and I decided to throw a baby shower for our friends Ali Hoelzer and Bri Loftin. The two Ali's are amazing when it comes to scrapbooking. Ali Walston thought it would be cool to make them scrapbook pages. So we went and got the stuff and cut all the pieces and then at the end of the shower we had everyone put the pages together. We put the finished pages (minus the pictures, of course) in the albums and gave that as our combined gift. Now, I feel really good about being a part of that but I have to be honest and say that it was all Ali's idea. She is the mastermind behind the awesome gift. There are scrapbookers and then there are scrapbookers. She is the latter. Anyway, since the shower I am all inspired about making awesome pages. Now I just wish I had the money and the time to do it.

Another example of how talented the two Ali's are is from the Richards family plaque (is that what these are called?). They are both in the YW presidency and made these for a YW activity. I was very surprised and happy to receive one at Christmas. Such good friends that they thought to make me one. They both have wonderful decorations that they make themselves. My sister Chelsey is really good at this too.


During the baby shower a few of us happened to glace over at the table and see these really cool, fun cookie pots. Come to find out, Bri (who is due next week) had spent hours making this awesome cookie flower arrangement. So fun! And so cute! So motivated to be that pregnant and make such fun thank yous!


The final thing that reminds me of how talented the people I surround myself with is from Sunday. I had my first Teacher Development Meeting on Sunday for all the teachers. I got there early to set up and to my surprise, my first counselor was already there--table set up with plates, napkins, cups and a plate of lemon bars. I should also mention that there was a nice white table cloth. I kind of laughed to myself because I remembered that her last calling was the second counselor in the Relief Society.


In this ward we call people to the Primary as "Primary workers" so we can move them around wherever we need them or want them. We are very short on willing and worthy members for
callings in this ward so I had to take my pianist (who is one of three people in the ward that plays) and put her as the nursery leader. I have been wondering if that is the right place to put her and had it confirmed to me on Sunday that at least for now, it is! Her husband is out of town for a week, she is about 7 1/2 months pregnant and has a 15 month old, but she showed up to the meeting with this newsletter for the nursery. I am so impressed.

Mike and I both have been amazed at all the things the women around me are doing. I think maybe Mike wishes I was a little more like that? We laughed and said that these are the reasons so many Mormon women are depressed. Everyone thinks they have to be perfect--"Yeah, but so and so can do___________" I choose to be inspired and thankful I get to partake of the talents around me rather than be depressed. Or, maybe I should just tell them all to stop being so perfect so the rest of us don't feel so bad. :)

**These are not great pictures. I just wanted to show some examples.

Comments

Jess and Jen said…
Hey, as good as they are at what you've shown, they're equally crappy at other things. We all have tools we bring to the table. Some come across as scrapbooking/crafty, some are organizational, some are humor, some are beauty (look at me...), etc.

I am glad your primary "workers" seem to be on the ball. I've never (!) seen something that nice/organized for nursery. Pretty sweet.
Jess, of course you are right. But thankfully, the things people are crappy at aren't as obvious a lot of the time. I'm trying to decide which of the qualities you listed, I am. :) I am also glad that the workers are on the ball. It makes everything better. I was amazed when Cherstin showed me the newsletter. It is front and back and has a spotlight for a song they are focusing on that week. It is really fun. How is Relief Society going for Jen?
Elder Richey said…
The Nursery Newsletter is such a wonderful idea!! I think I might casually mention that to some friends of mine who are in the Primary presidency.

I'm also going to make note of that craft they made in your YW. Good idea.

You sound like you have some amazing, talented, and thoughtful friends. What a blessing.
Pitcher Family said…
I can't help but think of the amazing murals, paintings, quiet books, etc. that you have created! You have incredible talents! It's good that we are not all the same, how boring would that be??
Oh, and Jess..you are beautiful.

Katie, I'm glad I could pass on ideas to you. You will be awesome in YW. I am lucky to have such talented and thoughtful friends and I'm glad you are one of them!

Mandy, It is actually funny because Mike mentioned your name when we were talking about the Mormon women being depressed when they see everyone else be perfect. We tried to think of something you didn't do well and couldn't think of anything. Thanks for saying I'm talented.
Papa Doc said…
I'm always to impressed with your ability write so well. Add that to your talents -- and you painted a wonderful mural on a bedroom wall and you play with your boys. You are a great cook, etc., etc. You certainly have no reason to feel depressed.
Kudos to those who have the crafty talents -- kudos to those who don't care.
Mom
Mom, thanks. I am not depressed about it. I actually am really excited to learn how to do some of the things my friends are doing. And I'm very grateful there are women willing to magnify their callings. It has been a really good example to me.
Marcy said…
I love organization things. I'm not usually jealous of crafty people. I've often thought nursery leaders should have a place on their rolls to list the location of the parent (so if there is a problem with the kid any leader can easily find the parents).

Anyway, I am jealous of those people who--like most of my sisters-in-law and sister--are so dedicated in their exercising. THAT'S what gets me feeling inadequate.

Also, I know there are many people who are a lot more thoughtful toward others than I am. That's another area I wish I could improve.
molly said…
“Kudos to those who don’t care”. Good attitude. It is vein to compare ourselves with other women. Perfection’ism’ is a dangerous though process. One women can not do it all. So focus on your own strengths. What do you love? You are ‘assuming’ that your husband wants you to be like everyone else. I bet he will pick his values very carefully and let you know if there is something particular he wants. Don’t pressure yourself. Just be. We are glad you are here.

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